Simplicity I believe has power, my self will and determination is somewhat of an uncertain dilemma. I keep coming back to this article because of a running dialogue with my own soul and the peripheral glances at my unconscious. Am I willing to go to any lengths to progress in being truly attuned to my best meaning and greatest service to the universe … or am I “just kidding”. If it’s the latter the jokes on me — life is not a dress rehearsal. Am I willing to do whatever amount of meditation, whatever surrender to a higher purpose, whatever open mindedness to actually change the way I am processing reality? I’ve taken LSD and eaten a psilocybin mushroom at “historic dose” levels and the trips were dramatized reinforcement of what I already consciously believed; namely this is all one thing, just energy, and we really are fabricating our reality. I’ve used alcohol everyday to simply medicate myself into non-thinking and then after fully addicting myself spent the last 21 years in complete abstinence if not always spiritually or psychologically sober.

Am I willing to go to any lengths? Laughter is good. For weeks my Honduran asylum refuge partner has been telling me (in his innocence) about frequent calls from Sam Rick. I asked him if he knew the Sam and he looked at me in bewilderment. I pay for his phone, I finally demanded to see the phone when it rang. Oh, “Spam Risk”. Damn, I answer those calls from my own ego all the time. I have decided to start calling my ego Sam.